The Guinness Premiership Final: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

What a game!  The Guinness Premiership final between reigning champions Leicester and pretenders to the throne Saracens was a pulsating match and the best I have seen in years. 

The lead changed hands five times during the course of the game.  Just when Saracens thought they had snatched the win as Glen Jackson slotted over a penalty with four minutes on the clock, Leicester conjured a try from the resulting restart and substitute Dan Hipkiss stormed over to clinch the cup.

33-27 was the final score.  Breathless rugby.  It's almost impossible to sit here and write "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly" for this game, because as finals go it was top drawer entertainment.

But here goes anyway.

The Good

Toby Flood:  One of the key men for Leicester, and he delivered in spades.  Only missing one kick from the tee, Flood controlled the game well.

Dan Hipkiss - The Tigers centre has been sidelined with injury of late, but he made the biggest impact in the match when he came on from the bench and steamrollered his way over for the winning try.

Geordan Murphy - Who stepped aside when it was time to lift the cup and gave the captains honour to departing stars Lewis Moody and Ben Kay.  I thought that was really sweet.

Attacking rugby - Both teams played expansively and threw everything into the game.  It was refreshing to see teams almost forget it was a final and go out and play.  Take note Toulouse and Biarritz.

Ernst Joubert - Two tries for the Sarries skipper, which sadly for his side, was just not enough.

The Bad

No Brendan Venter - Saracens' director of rugby (and everyone's favourite panto villain) was forced to watch the game at home after failing to get his ban overturned.  A real shame.  Venter has been one of the real characters this year, adding colour and spice to the game.  I know he's not everyone's cup of tea, but I think he is brilliant.

Defence - But who cares when it gives you entertainment like that?  Well, the defence coaches might I suppose...

Not respecting the kicker - Sarries' fans booed when Flood lined up a couple of his kicks.  I know it's not the done thing, but in such a massive game and when they thought they had been hard done by, I can't really blame them.

The Ugly

I can't think of anything.  No really, I can't.  This game was everything I wanted a final to be.

Oh there is one thing:  the fact that I will have to wait until September until the league starts again for the new season.

Glee and the Guinness Premiership Final

Leicester Tigers and Saracens are the last teams standing in the Guinness Premiership race to Twickenham, where the two rivals will meet in the final on Saturday.

This is the sixth final in a row for reigning champions Leicester who finished the regular season in top spot.

Saracens, on the other hand, were league leaders until the halfway point, thanks to a controlled and uninspiring kicking game.  But then, fastforward a couple of months, and a team trip to Brighton and a couple of controversies later, Brendan Venter's team is thrilling to watch and racking up the tries.

Saturday's clash should be a corker.

But what do Leicester stars Geordan Murphy, Ben Youngs and Jordan Crane think of their chances? 

Do Sarries' Brad Barritt and Andy Saull think they can get their hands on the silverware?

And more to the point, which one of these is a closet fan of Glee?

All is revealed...

Skillz

Guinness Premiership finalists Leicester and Saracens are both pretty slick when it comes to ball handling, lineouts, scrum time and racking up the points.

But which team is better at, say, throwing balls through the sunroof of a Landrover?

I wonder...

There's only one way to find out.

First up, Leicester Tigers:



Hmm, pretty poor.  Can Sarries do any better?



We have a winner.

But are these skillz a pointer to who will win the final?

Of course not.  Don't be silly.

The Final Shakedown

After Sunday's epic Guinness Premiership semi-finals we have a tasty clash between Leicester Tigers and Saracens to look forward to at Twickenham on May 29.

Leicester smothered Bath into submission in a 15-6 tryless affair, whilst Sarries squeaked past Northampton Saints 21-19 at Franklins Gardens.

Each game was packed with twists, controversy and bucket loads of irony.

Who can forget one-time Sarries bound Soane Tonga'uhia steaming over for a Saints try on the stroke of half time?  Did Toby Flood's high flying penalty really count for the Tigers?

And then there were the subplots: The extra needle between Saints and Sarries after Celebrationgate, the alleged tapping up of Northampton prop Brian Mujati by Saracens, Brendan Venter's misconduct charge.

All the extra needle created an afternoon of high drama, and I for one, loved it.

The final results?  Heartbreak for Saints and Bath, heaven for Leicester and Saracens.

And it should be a storming final in a couple of weeks. 

My faith in English club rugby has been fully restored.  Roll on Twickenham in two weeks time.

I, for one, cannot wait.

Bye Bye Borthwick - Hello Courtney Lawes?

England captain Steve Borthwick has been ruled out of Saracens' Guinness Premiership title bid due to injury and is likely to miss England's summer tour down under.

Wonky-nosed Steve has lost his battle against a knee problem which saw him miss England's showdown with France in the Six Nations.

A new bout of tendinitis has scuppered his return to training with Saracens and put his inclusion in England's June tour to Australia and New Zealand in doubt.

It has been revealed today that the lock needs another two months of conditioning and rest to return to full fitness.

Bothers was targeting a return against Leicester this Saturday - a match which could dictate if Sarries will grab a home semi-final.

But has his absence been a bad thing?

Some of his critics have linked Borthwick's stint on the sidelines with Saracens' recent impressive and explosive play.  Sarries have been doing very well without him, thank you very much, and England seemed to cope just fine in his absence.

OK, so England lost to France, but under skipper Lewis Moody they were a much hungrier and dynamic force.

So with one of England's first choice second rows laid up, it looks like there'll be a space in the starting line-up. 

Cometh the hour, cometh the man.  The World Cup is but months away.

Courtney Lawes anyone?

Yes I think so.

But we'll probably just get Louis Deacon again...

Awesome.

Soane Long Saints?

Soane Tonga'uiha is the latest player to be embroiled in a Chuckle Brothers style "To me, to you" tug of war.

First we saw James "Jimmy" Haskell starring as the rope in a ridiculous battle between Stade Francais and England.

Now, Northampton prop Tonga'uiha has thrown the cat amongst the pigeons by signing a new deal with the Saints - three months after he agreed a contract with Saracens for next season.

As a result, everything is kicking off.

Edward Griffiths, Sarries' Chief Executive, isn't exactly full of the joys of spring.  In fact, he has slammed Northampton and called them "April Fools".

He said: "On April Fool's Day, Northampton have announced they have signed a new contract with Soane. This contract is illegal and irrelevant.

"The sad reality is that a proud Premiership club has brought our game into disrepute.

"They have shown complete contempt for legality, justice and integrity and have made themselves look like the ultimate April fools. We must now decide whether we operate a league where signed agreements mean something and are respected, or whether we have chaos."

So he's not a happy Easter bunny then.

But what's going to happen if Griffiths gets his way?

If Tonga'uiha's Saracens' contract stands up, are they going to force him to join them?  Do Sarries really think they're going to get the best out of a player who would rather be plying his trade 50 miles up the M1?

Time to wheel in lawyers, but it would be nice if this could all be sorted out sensibly and behind closed doors.

For a change.

Who Will Be the Champions?

The Guinness Premiership is rounding the find bend and all the teams at the top are sharpening their spikes for the final run in.

Last week I upset Sale fans when I picked the Sharks as the team most likely to slip into the Championship next season.

Now, I'm going to crane my neck and look at the top of the table to see just who could be Guinness Premiership Champions.

Let's delve into each team's remaining fixtures, do a bit of crappy maths and conjure up a potential winner.

Here are the teams with their current league positions, points and run in:

Leicester Tigers

Points: 58
Position: 1st
Fixtures: Bath (H), Falcons (A), Harlequins (H), Saracens (H)

Playoff tip:  It's not a bad run in for the Tigers with three of their last four games at fortress Welford Road.  Coach Richard Cockerill will expect to pick up five points against both the Falcons and Quins, and I expect Leicester to battle out wins againsts Bath and Sarries.  A top two spot and a home semi-final awaits.

Northampton Saints

Points: 56
Position: 2nd
Fixtures: Leeds (A), Gloucester (H), Bath (A), Saracens (H), London Irish (A)

Playoff tip:  The Saints have a tougher run in than Leicester with tricky away games against Bath and the Exiles.  Leeds could be a potential banana skin as they battle relegation, but Northampton will expect to take the full five points this weekend.  An LV= Cup final rematch against Gloucester could be a humdinger of a grudge match, and whilst Sarries's form has been pretty rubbish, last weekend they put Newcastle to the sword in a seven try demolishion job.  Despite this, Northampton are the form team and in pole position for a home semi final.

Saracens

Points: 51
Position: 3rd
Fixtures: Gloucester (A), Sale(A), Harlequins (H), Northampton (A), Leicester (A)

Playoff tip:  A very tough run-in for Brendan Venter and chums.  Away trips to Franklins Gardens and Welford Road in the final two rounds are a massive ask for a team with stuttering form.  Gloucester away won't be easy as the cherry and whites are also strong right now.  Sale should be a four or five pointer, but the game against Quins could be tricky.  I think Sarries have peaked too soon and will finish in 5th.

London Irish

Points: 48
Position: 4th
Fixtures: Wasps (A), Worcester (A), Leeds (H), Gloucester (A), Northampton (H)

Playoff tip:  With the exception of Gloucester and Northampton this isn't a bad run in for the Exiles.  But what about Wasps?  Well, to be honest I'm not quite sure how Danny Celebriani and pals have climbed so high up the table, as losses to Leeds, Sale and Saints in recent weeks is hardly championship form.  Therefore I expect Irish to bag a win at Adams Park, take the points from Leeds and Worcester and finish in third or fouth.  I think they'll be happy with a semi-final, even though it won't be at home.

Wasps

Points: 44
Position: 5th
Fixtures: London Irish(H), Worcester (A), Bath (A), Newcastle Falcons (H)

Playoff tip:  Wasps will finish out of the top four.  They have one game less to play than most of their rivals and can't realistically target the Newcastle or Worcester games as sure things.  The Falcons beat Wasps at home, and Wasps on the road are about as tough to beat as a team of under 7s.  They will finish in 6th.

Bath

Points: 42
Position: 6th
Fixtures: Leicester (A), Sale (H), Northampton (H), Wasps (A), Leeds(A)

Playoff tip:  Bath look to be timing their run in rather nicely.  A dreadful first half of the season saw them languishing down at the bottom of the table, but an impressive run of form hsa propelled them to in touching distance of the top four.  Steve Meehan's men are the best team in the league on current form having grabbed 30 of the last 35 available league points.  They're also the best team away from home with 25 points scored on the road.  Bath are coming up on the rails fast and I think they'll pip Wasps to a playoff place.

So, with form and the run-in analysed, I think the semi-finalists will be:

1. Leicester Tigers
2. Northampton Saints
3. London Irish
4. Bath Rugby 

But which team will be crowned champions?

Gut feeling?  I think it could well be Northampton's year.

Put your hands up for the Saints

Why?

I don't know.  As I say it's just a feeling.  Everything coming out of the club at the moment is positive.  They have several international players with plenty more on the fringes.  The Saints have already won their first piece of silverware this year with the LV= Cup and they are the only English team still in the Heineken Cup.  The coaching set up of Jim Mallinder, Dorian West and Paul Grayson has worked wonders.  Everything just seems to be clicking at the right time.

It's not that I'm discounting Leicester, Bath and London Irish - it's just that these teams don't seem to have that extra spark right now.  Leicester are great at home but their away form hasn't been as impressive and their high profile departures are unsettling.  OK, so Soane Tonga'uiha is leaving Northampton for Sarries next season and Neil Best is heading to Worcester - but I hear Tonga'uiha is now trying to stay at Franklins Gardens do the the postive outlook at the club.

I could wheel out some stats about the final league position of teams who have gone on to win the title in previous years, but I won't as I don't think that really matters.

If the top four shapes up as above, I think Northampton will beat London Irish in the semi-final and go on to do a job on Leicester in the final.

Again, don't ask me why, but I just have a feeling....

Blogger's Curse

OK, so I appear to have picked up the blogger's equivalent of commentator's curse. No sooner had I hailed buff Berrick Barnes and foxy Felipe Contepomi as players to watch during the Autumn Internationals they have both been ruled out through injury.

Barnes picked up an ankle ligament injury in a training session before the Wallabies Bledisloe Cup match against New Zealand tomorrow, and Contepomi is out as he failed to recover from the knee ligament damage that forced him out of action for Leinster back in May. Balls. It's like I've got some sort of inadvertant injury hex going on: as soon as I decide I like the look of a player he hobbles off the pitch with a wonky limb/broken bone/weird tropical disease. Maybe that's why Jonny Wilkinson racked up so many injuries over the past few years as I really, really liked him...

You know, I think might be onto something here. Jonny seemed to shake off all those pesky 'stingers' and 1001 other random afflictions when I turned my attention to Rob Kearney last season.... who then promptly fell really ill with the mumps.

Oh.

Let's just hope Messrs Wilkinson and Carter remain unscathed this time as I don't fancy either of them now, honest.

Anyway, also in the news, referee David Rose apologised to Leeds Carnegie this week after wrongly disallowing resident Shrek lookalike Hendre Fourie's first half try in last weekend's game against Saracens. The try was incorrectly disallowed when the match was evenly poised on 6-6 just ahead of half time.

Shrek in action

Leeds Director of Rugby Andy Key said:
"Credit to Rosey he has phoned us and admitted his mistake. That try would have put a different complexion on the game and it's very frustrating for us."

It certainly is very frustrating. If the try had stood and had been converted then it could have changed the course of the game and helped Leeds to their first win of the season instead of the 21-15 scoreline which gave the win to Saracens. I was not amused when I read about this on the BBC website and have made a mental note to start some form of mild hate campaign against David Rose, possibly involving muttering some naughty words under my breath and secretly flicking him the V's whenever I see him refereeing a game.

Boooo: Not exactly smelling of roses on this occasion

In his interview with BBC Radio Leeds this week, Key also alluded to the fact that certain pundits and referees almost expect Leeds to make certain errors meaning that they look out for these mistakes and penalise Leeds when they actually did nothing wrong. I can see his point, and hopefully after this refereeing mistake and close run game against the league leaders, Leeds will get some of the credit that they deserve.


Anyway, it's predictions time again. Here are my winners and losers this week (winners highlighted in bold):

Guinness Premiership

Sale v Gloucester
Bath v Saracens
Harlequins v London Irish
Leicester v Northampton
Newcastle v Worcester
Wasps v Leeds Carnegie

The Magners League

Connacht v Scarlets
Ospreys v Glasgow
Leinster v Cardiff Blues
Munster v Ulster
Edinburgh v Newport-Gwent D'gons

Hopefully I can improve on last week's 63% of correct predictions.

Don't forget, Leeds Carnegie are on Sky Sports this Sunday afternoon as their game against Wasps is being televised. Apparently Simon Shaw and Joe Worsley are back for Wasps, wheras Leeds have recalled Jonny "Baby Face" Hepworth after his twinkle-toed hat trick try scoring performance for the A-Team on Monday. Unfortunately Hannibal, BA and Howling Mad Murdoch are unavailable for selection.

10 Studs to Watch

So the rugby season is now well under way, and if you're one of the few Leeds Carnegie fans like me then it's been yet another depressing start. Still, like the popular mantra on an all day drinking session - it's a marathon not a sprint - and whilst Saracens might be masquerading as speed king Usain Bolt at moment, there's still plenty of games left for my yo-yo loving team to metamorphosize into Paula Radcliffe and limp over the line in 11th place. Who knows, they might even sneak into 10th if they don't keep stopping like Paula to curl out yet another shit performance.

Anyway, with five games down I've had plenty of time to distract myself from Leeds' lacklustre start and survey the finer studs trotting about 22 yard lines up and down the country. Oh and how can I forget the fine specimens in the Magners league? Therefore, for my inaugural post on this blog I think it's only fitting for me to introduce my list of top 10 Studs to Watch this season (although I do reserve the right to amend this list as the season progresses!).

1. Rob Kearney

Well, where do I start with Leinster's gorgeous Rob Kearney? He's got sultry, smouldering looks, bucketloads of Irish charm and one hell of a sexy bod. I've admired Rob's footballing skills for a few years now, but the fact that he is so God damn handsome does help to maintain my interest. If I ever have the pleasure of meeting the lovely Rob I will ply him with Guinness and play with his curly black hair (on his head, before you get any ideas).

2. Brian O'Driscoll

In at number two is another Leinster man, the one and only BOD. In fact I'm kind of considering moving over to Dublin and switching my allegiance to the Irish province, as even if they lose there's always something (or someone) entertaining to watch. Everyone knows about BOD: his twinkly crinkly eyes, his biceps that are to die for and not forgetting his wisdom about not adding tomatoes to fruit salads. BOD has undergone a renaissance over the past year and I can only speculate that this is probably due in part to his engagement to the lovely (and very lucky) Amy Huberman. Although come on Brian - spelling out 'Will you marry me' in flower petals? That's just a little bit cheesy.

3. Danny Care

Q: Who likes Care Bears?

A: Me.

Ex-Leeds Tyke and now Harlequin, Danny 'Care Bear' Care initially set my pulse racing when he was snapped in the buff for the Everyman Campaign earlier this year. I don't think I need to say anything else about Danny's charms as the above picture speaks for itself. Nice ball too.

4. Olly Barkley

Gloucester or Bath? Gloucester or Bath? It was a tough decision for Olly to switch back and forth between these local rivals, but who cares about all that when he's got such lovely eyebrows and sexy curly hair (if you don't mind wiping your hands because of all the hair gel). Olly's currently recovering from a pesky broken leg, so anyone who'd like to help out with nursing duties please form an orderly queue...

5. Marco Wentzel

As a Leeds fan I had to include a Leeds player, and whilst my favourite player (tubby powerhouse Mike Macdonald) is still languishing stateside waiting for his visa, a new addition to the squad has caught my attention this season. Marco Wentzel was enlisted by World Cup winning Supremo Neil Back and his mate Andy Key, and so far has made a big impression with his powering runs and skills in the line out. Oh, and did I mention that he's pretty hot too? (Nice pose by the way Marco).

6. Ben Foden

When he's not busy cultivating his ridiculous Musketeer-style facial hair, Ben Foden is really rather handsome. Tipped as one to watch for purely his rugby skills, Northampton's Ben is also one to watch for more aesthetically pleasing reasons. Currently dating Una Healy from girl band 'The Saturdays' maybe Ben is trying to raise his profile and rise to fame in a similar way as Danny Cipriani?

Which brings me, rather predictably to number 7: the aforementioned Mr. C.

7. Danny Cipriani

Yes, I admit it: Danny Cipriani is foxy, although this admission does grate on me as I find myself really struggling to like him in his new guise as a 'celebrity'. I'm not knocking him for his desire to bump uglies with Kelly Brook as if I was that way inclined then I'd probably want to do the same, but Danny needs to sort out his priorities and concentrate on the game that is his real reason for fame rather than cavorting around Necker Island with his scantily clad bikini model/actress girlfriend. OK, when I put it like that I can see why he's been a little distracted.

8. Mark Cueto

Sale stalwart Mark Cueto knows how to fill a pair of underpants and work a locker. (OK, maybe he needs to practice his modelling skills but who cares when he's got a six-pack and a, ahem, package like that?)

9. Mike Phillips

Ospreys, Wales and the Lions' scrum half Mike Philips is keen to point out that he's number one, but I'm sorry to say Mike that you only sneak in at number nine on my list. I suppose this is quite fitting as that's the number of the shirt that you've so effortlessly made your own in recent years, but either way you are pretty damn fine and in at number nine. (Oh, I just rhymed).

10. Ryan Lamb

Last but by no means least in my top ten Studs to Watch list is a bit of leftfield choice. London Irish's Ryan Lamb usually plays at fly half, but last week he packed down at number eight in an impressive display against Leinster. I can only reason that I have been seduced by Ryan's ferrety looking charms after watching his mercurial performance against my beloved Leeds a few weeks ago. That, and the fact that he seemed to be aiming his kicks towards me in the pre-match warm up. Maybe that classes as flirting where he comes from?

Right, that's all for now. I'll be back with some more rugby related studdery very soon. Who knows, I might even be able to report a first win of the season for Leeds this Sunday...

Until then...