McCaw wins IRB Player of the Year... again

Sod off, the trophy's mine.

Not really. Well, not yet anyway.

Yes, it's the that time of year where the powers that be at the International Rugby Board have announced the runners and riders for this year's IRB Player of the Year.

Joining reigning Player of the Year, New Zealand skipper Richie McCaw, on the shortlist are team-mate Mils Muliaina, France number eight Imanol Harinordoquy, Australian duo David Pocock and Kurtley Beale and South Africa's Victor Matfield.

It's an interesting, if slightly uninspiring selection.  No doubt gap-toothed gypsy and Sky Sports pundit, Stuart Barnes, was salivating into his Cornish pasty when he saw his ultimate commentating wank-fodder, Biarritz and France back-row forward Harinordoquy, in the top six.  McCaw's New Zealand team-mate, full-back Muliaina, has enjoyed a good season and starred in the All Blacks side that swept to an impressive clean sweep in this year's Tri-nations.  Only a Bledisloe Cup loss to Australia in Hong Kong created an annoying blot on New Zealand's copy book this season. McCaw, along with Dan Carter, was the crucial cog in a well-oiled All Blacks machine.

Wallaby flanker David Pocock has been immense at the breakdown and his inclusion is the one I am most pleased about.  The 22-year-old openside flanker has burst onto the international stage and it would be a brilliant achievement if he is the man to dethrone opposite number McCaw.  Pocock has arms as wide as Tim Payne's waist, is rumoured to be able to bench press a Ford Mondeo and could probably pluck a plane out the sky if he could be arsed.

His fellow green and gold team-mate, Kurtley Beale, is a full-back brimming with blistering pace - something England found out to their peril a couple of weeks ago.  To be honest, I expected Quade Cooper to beat him to the final list.  Then again, the Australia fly-half tackles as effectively as an arthritic cat with mild depression, which probably ruled him out.

And then there's Victor Matfield.  I have one question:  Why?

But who do you think should win, and who would you have liked to have seen on the list?  There's only one way to find out.  I've created a poll which you can find on the right-hand toolbar.  If there's someone you would have voted for but who isn't included, then please feel free to vent your spleen in the comments.

As for me?  Well, it's got to be McCaw again, hasn't it?

Rugga Big Brother

If you live in the UK then there is a VERY good reason to avoid slumping into your sofa over the next month and go out and do something much more interesting instead. 

Yes, 'Celebrity' Big Brother is back on our screens for a mind-numbing four weeks, and this can only mean one thing: Newspapers and television will be awash with this year's batch of eleven fame hungry ZZZ-list 'celebrities' who are all aiming to dazzle us with their limited talents and try to relaunch their extinguished stars back into the glittering limelight.  For a few weeks at least.

Amongst the plethora of washed up attention seekers who will be 'entertaining' us this year is cross-dressing cage fighter Alex Reid, Dane Bowers (aka The Fat One from crappy 90's boyband 'Another Level'), and a random Page 3 model.  Woo hoo.

Lock the doors, turn off the cameras and leave them all in there for 5 years...

However, the start of 'Celebrity' Big Brother got me thinking.  Wouldn't it be great if we could sling a selection of rugby stars, pundits, coaches and maybe a referee into the Big Brother house and watch them ruck it out for four weeks?

Picture the scene: 

Pundit Stuart Barnes debates the finer points of the breakdown with Richie McCaw, who, after 3 hours of needling from The Barrel, yawns and hands-off the still chattering Barnesy and tunnels his way to the garden where he begins a high-hair contest with the lesser spotted Gavin Henson.  In the kitchen, Martin Castrogiavanni is whipping up a culinary masterpiece with the help of a salivating John Smit, whilst Matt Giteau pings bread rolls across the room so they perfectly land onto each of the twelve dining room plates.  In the bathroom, Schalk Burger is giving Luke Fitzgerald a facial (of the deep cleansing mudpack variety) whilst Jeremy Guscott arranges his splendid selection of scarves in colour-coded order in the bedroom.  Moving outside to the jacuzzi, we find ladies favourites Dan Carter and Rob Kearney enjoying a hot, bubbly dip whilst Rocky Elsom bench presses Gavin Henson's suitcase which is rammed full of haircare products.

Henson has the highest hair of them all

Also, imagine the tasks that Big Brother could challenge them with:

Marvel as John Smit battles it out against the clock in the pie-eating task.
Laugh when Rocky Elsom pile drives Jezza Guscott into the ground during the Tackle Bag challenge.
Gape in wonder when Stuart Barnes out sprints Rob Kearney in the Chicken Run Bleep Test.


I did consider throwing calamitous referee David Rose into the mix along with Rob Andrew and his new nemesis Saracens' boss Brendan Venter, but I decided that might end in a blood bath, and we had quite enough of all that blood-spitting in 2009.

Yes, it will never happen, but this is a reality TV show that I would definitely watch...

Baa-Baas: Holding onto Tradition?

Barbarians 25 - 18 New Zealand

Yesterday a Barbarians side predominantly filled with South Africans and Australians beat a second string New Zealand side at a far from full Twickenham.  Obviously the 25-18 scoreline was excellent for the Barbarians, as they were a team that only formed a week earlier and yet they managed to beat New Zealand for the first time since 1973 - yes, the first time since the game which included that famous try:

From what I saw yesterday's match was generally enjoyable.  It had tries galore, some enterprising breaks and entertaining running and all in all it was a good game.  I say this but I have to admit that it didn't have my full concentration as I was busily draping tinsel around my living room and trying to untangle a ball of fairy lights. 
 
As I watched the match with my left eye whilst using my right to organise my baubles, I did find this game slightly unusal.  I know the Baa-Baas is an invitational team but I did have to wonder why there was only a smattering of players from the northern hemisphere in the Barbarians side, especially as the game was being played at Twickenham.  Don't get me wrong, it was great to see the cream of the southern hemisphere take to the pitch together, but surely some deal has to be brokered with the clubs in order to include the top players from the home nations?
 
Where was Kearney, O'Driscoll, Castrogiavanni and Harinordoquy?  All these players are world class and could justify their invitation to the Barbarians side.
 
I would have loved to watch Fourie du Preez, Matt Giteau and Jamie Roberts link up with the dazzling O'Driscoll, with Tommy Bowe making strong runs down the wing and Rob Kearney taking masterful command at full back.  Instead it was all a bit weird, as New Zealand's Joe Rokocoko lined up for the Barbarians and faced up to the haka whilst Tommy Bowe was nowhere in sight.

Also, if the Barbarians truly want to keep their magic and tradition then they really should be given the opportunity to play against full strength sides, not a second string version as was the case with New Zealand yesterday.  To give him his dues, All Black captain Richie McCaw demanded to play as he saw the game as a fitting end to the tour.  My question is: why was the majority of the New Zealand first choice side sitting and watching the game in the stands?  OK so it's the end of their season but the All Blacks don't play again until June/July next year, so why not let the team play?  This begs the question as to whether games like these are still as important in a calendar full of fixtures as they once were, or whether the tradition of the Baa-Baas is falling prey to the money making machine.

Hat trick hero and man of the match for the Barbarians, Bryan Habana doesn't think so:

"The Barbarians take us back to what rugby is really about - the friendship and camaraderie. This game was a fantastic spectacle."

Yes I agree Bryan, it was a good game, but somehow it felt like there was something missing.

Still, there's always the tradition of the socks...

IRB Player of the Year (Or Not...)

So All Blacks Captain Richie McCaw is the IRB Player of the Year for 2009 and he becomes the first ever player to win this accolade for the second time.  Except he's not really the player of the year, is he?

My, what a big cup you have

Richie McCaw spent a lot of 2009 injured, and in that time the All Blacks looked off colour, suffered as their 'aura' slipped and failed to win the Tri-Nations. McCaw is undoubtedly a class act and the best openside flanker in the world, but I think 2009 was BOD's year - and before you say it I'm English so I'm not biased!

With everything he achieved this year O'Driscoll should have walked this award.  He led Ireland to their first Grand Slam in 61 years and Ireland remained unbeaten in 2009; he was an instrumental cog in the Leinster team that lifted the Heineken Cup, and according to Ian McGeechan he formed half of "the best centre partnership in world rugby" alongside Jamie Roberts with the Lions in South Africa this summer.

Oh and he can plait sawdust and yesterday he knitted a rather fetching scarf from the fog that shrouded Croke Park.

My sentiments exactly Brian

Seriously - what else did O'Driscoll have to do to win this award?  He had an excellent season by his own high standards and effectively stuck two fingers up at all the critics who dared to question if he was past his best.
Brian was robbed, and I am not happy.

Off-Colour All Blacks Beat Unbalanced England

England 6 - 19 New Zealand

Perched high up from my seat in Twickenham's west stand I watched a slightly off-colour All Blacks do enough to beat a rather unbalanced England on a drizzly afternoon at the home of rugby yesterday afternoon.

It was my first trip to Twickenham to watch an England test match, and whilst it might not have been the most exhilarating, free-flowing game in the world it was a brilliant occasion with a atmosphere to match.  England supporters haven't had much to cheer about in recent weeks, so with me fully expecting England to be dished out a rather unappetizing rugby lesson from Ritchie McCaw and pals, all I really hoped for was that England came out to play some rugby and didn't just capitulate at the hands of the currently top ranked team in the world.

"Right boys.  They've laid out the red carpet for us.  Let's give them a pasting."

Going in to this game there were plenty of subplots:
Dan Carter needed only two more points to overtake Andrew Mehrtons and become New Zealand's highest point scorer of all time.  There was also Carter's much hyped face off with Jonny Wilkinson to consider, heralded as a clash between the best fly-half in the world and his injury ravaged predecessor.  Oh, and then there was also the small matter of the microscope that had been firmly placed over Martin Johnson, his coaching squad and their team selection.  Surely a bad performance against New Zealand would result in a few casualties in this department, wouldn't it?

The game began and it was England who looked the steadier team and more physical and committed.  Matt Banahan looked like he'd caught a bought of rabies from 'Mad Dog' Lewis Moody, as from the kick off he sprinted and harried and gave Moody the opportunity to put pressure on the clearance kick from Dan Carter.  In fact, I don't know if Mehrton's record was playing on Carter's mind but he had a rather shaky start which developed into one of the worst performances I've seen him play.  With an astonishing record of slotting 31 out of his last 32 attempts on goal, the Twickenham crowd fully expected Carter to pass Mehrton's record within the first few minutes when New Zealand won a penalty.

The crowd held its breath and no doubt the commentators on Sky waxed lyrical about Carter's accuracy and his amazing conversion rate - just as Carter proceeded to push the ball wide.  WHAT?  A let off for England.

Rain started to fall and the game inevitably got a bit scrappy.  To their credit, both teams still tried to run with the ball and it didn't disintegrate into a tedious kick-fest.  A slippy ball and surface almost provided Ugo Monye with the opening try when he tackled Zak Guildford who was running the ball out of the New Zealand twenty-two, causing it to pop up and land in Monye's hands.  Monye sprinted over the line but the try was ruled out by referee Jonathan Kaplan.  I had a great view of Monye's effort and I thought it looked fine, but having seen the replay this morning, as much as it pains me to say it, Kaplan was right.

Despite their efforts to run the ball England's back line still played too deep and never really threatened the advantage line.  Jonny Wilkinson needs to stand flatter like he does at Toulon and drag the backs up with him.  With all the excitement of an 'almost try' for England, Wilkinson settled Twickenham's nerves by coolly kicking England's first scoring opportunity when New Zealand infringed at the breakdown.  3-0 to England after 15 minutes.

Jonny opens the scoring

What then followed was a litany of mistakes from the usually faultless Carter.  A missed kick into touch; a spill of the ball in the tackle; kicks up field that lacked their usual epic length.  Why Carter didn't try and put pressure on butterfingers Banahan and Monye with the high ball I don't know.  Instead he was happy to kick the ball up field where the much more composed Cueto was waiting, and despite not having played at full back for Sale this season he looked calm under the high ball.  Even though Carter's kicking boots weren't weaving their usual magic, the line-out that resulted from one of his successful kicks into touch almost saw New Zealand cross the line for the first time.  The ball was fed out from the line-out to Carter who was standing flat.  He passed the ball to Conrad Smith who made a break and linked up with full back Mils Mulianina who would have scored in the corner had it not been for Monye's rapid scramble defence.  A lesson for England:  New Zealand were playing flat, quickly crossed the advantage line and almost scored.  A worrying threat from the All Blacks at the end of the first quarter.

Finally, New Zealand fans got to see what they had been waiting for when Tim Payne was penalised for a couple of punches that he casually threw in at the breakdown.  I've no idea why this didn't earn him a yellow card so England were lucky in this respect, but not where Carter was concerned as he finally found his kicking boots and easily scored his first points of the game with a brilliant kick in the tricky conditions.  Congratulations on passing Mehrton's record Dan.

Carter lining up to pass Mehrton's record

Wilkinson and Carter exchanged another penalty each before half time (along with yet another uncharacteristic miss from Carter), and then the England belief and defence saw them shut down the New Zealand threat in the last five minutes of the half when they threatened the England line.  This was a definite step up from England's performance against Argentina.

The second half started in much the same way as the first, with both teams trying to play expansive rugby and both teams failing as the ball went to ground.  The first echoes of 'Swing Low, Sweet Chariot" reverberated from the stands but it couldn't prevent New Zealand scoring what turned out to be the only try of the game when scrum-half Jimmy Cowan crossed after excellent link up play between Sitiveni Sivivatu and Richie McCaw.  Now with his eyes firmly on the prize, Carter successfully kicked a difficult conversion from the touchline to take his tally to four kicks from six.  6-16 to the All Blacks after 59 minutes.

As the rain started to fall harder, England started to try and force the game.  Despite having a penalty in the bag, Jonny Wilkinson tried for a drop goal and failed.  Why didn't you push for the try Jonny or at least go back for the place-kicked penalty?  With England pushing the game New Zealand capitalized again due to their ability to quickly get over the gainline.  Replacement hooker Steve Thompson got pinged by referee Kaplan for diving in at the breakdown, gifting the rather off-colour Carter an easy penalty under the posts to take the score to 6-19 with just over ten minutes remaining.

Maybe the fact that England had made 112 tackles to New Zealand's 60 meant that they were tiring, so even with Geraghty and Tait on the field the last ditch attempts to pressurize the All Blacks line failed.

The game ended with a rather scrappy New Zealand beating England by 6-19. 

Before the game I said I wanted to see England play and they definitely did that to a higher standard than they showed against Australia and Argentina.  Industry, passion and commitment were all in evidence but accuracy and incision were sadly missing.  With the selections of Erinle and Hipkiss in the centre, Shaw in the second row and Banahan on the wing it was clear that Martin Johnson had assembled a team that could physically front up to the All Blacks.  That's fine, but in doing this there was no room for the finishers which left a rather unbalanced side.  There's a lot of work needed before the Six Nations, but hopefully with players like Toby Flood coming back from injury it might help sort out England's midfield woes.

New Zealand on the other hand, put in a generally good all round performance but with no real standout players.  I was really happy to watch them in my first ever live international game but they are still very much a work in progress and yesterday they weren't the prolific New Zealand side that I have come to expect.  Still, it's their third game on the bounce where they haven't conceded a try, although they've got plenty to work on before they face their big test of their autumn tour when they take on France in Marseille next weekend.