The England team that will get whipped by the All Blacks this Saturday has been announced this lunchtime.
Deep breath, here goes:
15 Mark Cueto (Sale Sharks)
14 Matt Banahan (Bath Rugby)
13 Dan Hipkiss (Leicester Tigers)
12 Ayoola Erinle (Biarritz)
11 Ugo Monye (Harlequins)
10 Jonny Wilkinson (Toulon)
9 Paul Hodgson (London Irish)
1 Tim Payne (London Wasps)
2 Dylan Hartley (Northampton Saints)
3 Duncan Bell (Bath Rugby)
4 Simon Shaw (London Wasps)
5 Steve Borthwick (Saracens, captain)
6 Joe Worsley (London Wasps)
7 Lewis Moody (Leicester Tigers)
8 James Haskell (Stade Francais)
16 Steve Thompson (Brive)
17 David Wilson (Bath Rugby)
18 Louis Deacon (Leicester Tigers)
19 Tom Croft (Leicester Tigers)
20 Danny Care (Harlequins)
21 Shane Geraghty (Northampton Saints)
22 Mathew Tait (Sale Sharks)
Awesome. Another makeshift fullback and Ben Foden sent back to Northampton. At least they've binned off Andy Goode. Still, with the likes of Borthwick 'leading' from the front, England are going to be fine right?
Wrong, it's time for Borthwick to go. He's OK but he's not an international captain and does everything to prove this. Did anyone see him rallying the England pack last weekend? No, me neither. Don't worry though, we've got the dynanism of Deacon waiting to explode off the bench. Great.
I'm unsure as to why Tait is on the bench. Surely he'd be a better choice at 12 than Erinle? Hmm. Still, it could be worse, they could be persisting with Banahan. Oh what's that? They are.
It's grim, but I predict New Zealand to bum England by at least 30 points.
Still, I've said it once and I'll say it again: at least I can distract myself with the more aesthetic delights of some the players trotting around on the pitch. And no, I'm not talking about Duncan Bell...